10 Things I’ve Learned Through Homeschooling

Homeschooling is the hardest job I’ve ever had.  In the last two years I’ve learned a lot, and I don’t just mean catching up on history I never encountered or math I’d long ago forgotten.  It has been like the refiner’s fire: the work of homeschooling sheds light on personality and relationship flaws.  I have learned a lot about myself and my children, and when we use that information correctly it provides opportunities for deepening relationships and personal growth.

Here are the lessons homeschooling has taught me:

#1. Planning for homeschooling can be fun and overwhelming all at the same time.

I love making lists, choosing curriculum, and planning unit studies.  Sometimes the planning can be more fun than the doing because the daily grind can make that flashy curriculum or involved unit study a chore.  I’ve come to see that if I spend longer planning a unit than it takes us to go through it then I’m not managing my time wisely.  There are also so many choices that I can get analysis paralysis and can’t choose.  The internet is a wonderful resource but also full of differing opinions.  I am finding it’s important to do my research reasonably, make an educated decision, then forge ahead to the best of my ability.

#2. You can take a good concept too far.

Working in organized units, grouping topics together, and working chronologically through topics is nice and tidy.  Learning in themed units is something I love, but sometimes a little too much.  I will hesitate to take advantage of a good resource because I’ll think we should save that for a full unit study.  I get frustrated if we’ve finished a unit and I see another idea that would have gone with that topic.  I try so hard to group everything together and work through topics methodically (and thus the planning that takes me forever, see #1).  Charlotte Mason warns against making all the connections for your students, and I think I am in danger of this sometimes.  I am finding my kids making fabulous connections on their own to books or topics we’ve studied months before.  I am still working on loosening up on themes and taking it as it comes a little more.

#3. Simplifying is wise.

I struggle with this because I am the queen of over-complicating.  I can’t seem to leave well enough alone with most curriculum or prepared unit studies.  On one hand it’s good because I have no problem tweaking things to fit us, let alone the fact that I probably wouldn’t be homeschooling if I kept everything simple!  On the other hand it has negative implications because I tend to over-think, over-research, and make things harder than they should be (see #1 and #2!).  I am working one knowing when enough is enough and stop planning and fretting and just let things flow.  Writing down my priorities and referring back to them is helping, as is gaining more experience so I can relax a little.

#4. The world is fascinating!

I was an A student all through school and college and a pro at doing what was necessary for the grade and then promptly dumping the information from my brain.  I was not excited about the information or focused on the topics–I was focused on the grade.  Now I’m finding I have an interest in everything: history, fine arts, nature study…it’s never too late to ignite a love of learning!

#5. Patience is a virtue that takes practice.

Unfortunately patience is not one of my natural strengths.  Diligence and responsibility are, but patience?  Not so much.  I have zero patience with bad attitudes, dilly-dallying, silliness when it interferes with necessary tasks, having to repeat myself due to lack of paying attention, frequent reminders to pick up the Legos or dirty socks, loud or hyper behavior, interruptions when I’m talking or reading aloud… well, you know, things kids can be pretty prone to doing.  I don’t often remember to use my gentle voice when reprimanding or reminding.  The good news?  Practice makes perfect.  Homeschooling is stretching me in this area, God is coming along beside and equipping me, and we’re all learning and loving each other despite our imperfect natures.

#6. Lessons are learned best through example.

As I see behaviors I would like to change in them, I can often find a related problem in myself.  I have to work on my own bad habits before I can address those of my children.  Speak kindly and respectfully at all times.  Do my work cheerfully.  Pick up after myself and keep the house tidy.  Again, loads of opportunity for personal growth and modelling that continual growth and effort to my children.

#7. It’s easy to forget to enjoy your kids when homeschooling.

I can be so focused on my goals and ever-growing to-do list that I forget to just spend time with my kids relaxing, having a (noneducational) conversation, or just looking at the clouds.  It was a bit easier to just BE with them when I didn’t have their education on my mind 24-7.  Should they be learning Latin?  How can I incorporate more project-based learning and independence?  Am I working with them enough on math or spelling or…?  My mind reels and I forget that often what really matters is love and attention from me.  This time will fly by, and as long as they love to learn and are prepared to learn their whole life it will all work out.

#8. Homeschooling isn’t like just being at home together, and it is hard work!

The mental drain of responsibility for their education and overseeing their daily tasks puts extra demands on the homeschooling parent.  I’m an introvert, and the sheer amount of interaction and talking required wears me out most days.  I realize that my style of homeschooling amplifies this–we read aloud a lot, work on subjects together, incorporate lots of hands-on activities, and shy away from worksheets.  I’ve found ways to cope like daily quiet time.  It took me a bit of time to realize the next lesson learned:

#9. You have to take care of yourself in order to do your job well.

Everyone uses the analogy of putting your oxygen mask on first so you can help your children.  It is true–learn what you need to feel fulfilled and schedule it in.  For example, I have learned I cannot skimp on sleep to get more done.  Now, that’s not to say I don’t try when things are busy, but it is never a wise move.  I suddenly become less productive and overly cranky.  There are many other priorities for my mental health: time with my husband, time with friends, time for personal interests.  I wrote about making time for things other than homeschooling, and shared techniques I learned over time to (try to) keep a balance in all things.

#10. Homeschooling requires a lot of time, energy, and sacrifice but it is worth it.

I’ve had to give up a lot of myself and my time to homeschool and it hasn’t always been easy.  I sometimes complain or feel grumpy or longingly listen to moms who have hours a day to themselves.  But most days I remember to be grateful we can set our family priorities.  When we’re hiking on a gorgeous weekday, learning about a period of history all together, or getting extra time with Daddy I am overwhelmed with gratefulness.

Hop over to iHomeschool network to see what others have learned through homeschooling.  Every Tuesday for the next 10 weeks I’ll be participating with the other bloggers of iHN in a blog hop of top ten lists.

This blog hop series was inspired by Angie of Many Little Blessings where you’re welcome to link up, too!